Rudimentary Awakining to Tactless Minds: November 2005

Toby's Fate is in Your Hands

Recently we have become aware of a site that is stirring up a lot of controversy lately in the world of the Internet. The character, of animal should we say, that all this is about is a small rabbit named Toby. Apparently if the owner does not make a certain amount of sales on his book, the rabbit will be executed and had for dinner. Sounds delicious, but take a look for your self at the link just below:

Save Toby

If you don't think you have the stomach to watch Toby die a horrible and very painful death and then enjoyed by those who use to take care of him, then save his ass. Go to the site and give into the author's evil scheme and buy the books. However, we here at RATM are going to call his bluff and not support the 'Save Toby' cause and see if the little beast actually dies.

It just goes to show you how clever we humans can be at times.

A look of Desperation from Toby

RATM Reporters Search for Burt Reynolds

We all here at RATM know that many of you have been wondering what has been going on with Burt Reynolds these days, fortunately we have an entire department dedicated to news on Mr. Reynolds. In response to the overwhelming demand for news on Burt, we recently launched an expedition to find him.

First we consulted his family and friends, which was essentially useless. After much research and consulting our secret agent Ethan Hunt, we learned Reynolds was hunting deep in the woods of his home state of Michigan. Initially we sent 6 reporters on the mission, and before they even made it 56 miles from where Reynolds was believed to be, 2 perished in diasterious conditions that remain unknown still to this day. However though, the 4 remaining located Burt high up in a tree fort that he had made for himself to stay in while hunting. When they yelled up at him asking him for a short interview, this was his noted response,

"You bastards will never catch me alive, if you want me to come down then I will have to be dead!!"

Shortly after that, a gun/stick fight ensued between our reporters and Mr. Reynolds. For those of you who frequent this site, you will recall that we have been in many altercations with Burt due to his alcoholic nature. This particular mini war lasted about 1.5 hours, leaving many of our reporters wounded by arrows, bullets and Chinese stars. The fight was brought to a halt finally when our men discovered Reynolds' weakness for gummy bears. They quickly assembled a trebuchet from surrounding natural resources and launched several giant gummy bears at him.

Trebuchet launching giant gummy bear at Burt Reynolds

Unfortunately, after the long battle, Mr. Reynolds was injured when a giant gummy bear hit him in the head. He was unable to give us any statement, so our men left him in the woods with 150 giant gummy bears. We plan to go back in a few years, to ascertain the fate of Mr. Reynolds if Hollywood hasn't done it sooner.

Court Ends War Amongst Toy Makers

On Thursday November 17th 2005, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled that Mega Blocks has just as much right in the playrooms of the nation as Lego. This decision marks the ending of a long 9 year feud between the two brick makers.

Lego filed the suit declaring that Mega Blocks' bumps on the blocks looked remarkably similar to their own and could cause confusion. Mega Blocks' CEO Chandler Wadell had this to say,

"First, we are glad that this war is finally over. Secondly, Legos' claim that our bumps are a rip off of theirs is vastly wrong. Our brick bumps are hand crafted from the finest plastic and styled to be state of the art."

The Supreme Court of Canada made this inspirational speach after it's ruling,

"The fact is that the monopoly on the brick is over, and Mega Blocks and Lego bricks may be interchangeable in the bins of play rooms around the nation(Canada)- dragons, castles and knights may be designed with them, without any distinction."

The fact that Mega Blocks and Legos are able to mingle freely in toy bins of Canada shows a strong leap on the nations' part towards ethics for toys, putting to shame the U.S., where Mega Blocks are forced to sit in the back of the toy bin.

The Supreme Court of Canada making it's ruling on Thursday

Blue Screen of Death

Here's a neat little example of how the BSOD can be good in our day to day activities. I don't know if this shirt really exists for sale or not, so look for it and tell me. Also, for those of you who want to download a really cool program, check my link below:

Blue Screen of Death

Website Catches Eye of RATM Super-Computer

After our super computer was powered up earlier this year and sent on the Internet to search for the most inspiring website, a few possible answers have arisen. One of the most interesting has been included in the link below:

Time cube