A day in The Life of Tony Danza

From his start on Fast Lane Blues in 1977 to Whos the Boss to his latest project in post-production, Aftermath Tony Danza has captivated our lives as we were growing up. His errie manner floats all about him giving little children sheer dread yet reassuring them with a sense of warmth and welcome.

"I always loved kids, they give me so much joy. They're so smart and innocent, and there is so much you can learn from them. There's nothing like watching children play from the other side of a playground fence" explained Danza.

When asked if he often watched his kids on the school playground, Danza simply responded with,

"No, I don't have kids. I see all children as my kids, and I can usually guess what their favorite kind of candy is. I see nothing wrong with giving kids candy through the chain link fence while they are on recess" stated Danza.

We asked Tony Danza what he did when he wasn't make episodes of his very own TV show or watching children from afar."I was always fascianted at Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory, which why I decided to get into candy making. It's a very profitable business. Taffy is my favorite, and i'll usually toss a bag or two of it to the kids".

Google to Build Lunar Base

Google Copernicus Center is hiring

Google is interviewing candidates for engineering positions at their lunar hosting and research center, opening late in the spring of 2007. This unique opportunity is available only to highly-qualified individuals who are willing to relocate for an extended period of time, are in top physical condition and are capable of surviving with limited access to luxuries and modern conviences.

The Google Copernicus Hosting Environment and Experiment in Search Engineering (G.C.H.E.E.S.E.) is a fully integrated research, development and technology facility at which Google will be conducting experiments in entropized information filtering, high-density high-delivery hosting (HiDeHiDeHo) and de-oxygenated cubicle dwelling. This center will provide a unique platform from which Google will leapfrog current terrestrial-based technologies and bring information access to new heights of utility.

It's okay, you're not the only one saying, "what the fuck?" Apparently by locating a research and technology center on the Moon, Google engineers will be able to experiment with an entirely different set of parameters. For example, imagine tapping unlimited solar energy to drive megawatt data centers and power innumerable arrays of massively parallel lava lamps, with ample no-cost cooling available to regulate the temperature of server farms sprawling over acres of land unblighted by sentient lifeforms or restrictive zoning ordinances.


The first non-trivial challenge is building a lunar base. Google began drawing up plans for the construction of a lunar facility in the Copernicus Crater early in 1998, when the company's founders Larry Page and Sergey Brin were still graduate students at Stanford University. Applying a Patel extrapolation to Rosing linear projections, Page and Brin predicted that every man, woman and child on earth would be conducting at least seven searches a day by the year 2018.
Fuck Google. How dare they make such a bold claim. You people should fear them...and yes...I understand that Blogger is owned by Google...and I see how ironic it is....shut the fuck up.

The Special Olympics

Kids playing Basketball! Little do they know that the losing team's bodies are put in a bio mass que for reprocessing into food for clones.A Special Olympic contestant wins the Gold! Or so it would seem. No more than 3 seconds after this shot he was pushed into the pool with 230 lbs. of weight tied to his feet.
Thomas J. Witner. Believed to be spying on U.S. Officials. Killed by a Tomahawk Cruise missle while wheeling home.A Special Olympic track meet? Nope. Athletes forced to compete in, 'Run from the bulldozer'. There were no survivors.Sailboat racing is a fantastic sport for the Special Olympics. When boats want to go faster they toss the Special Ed kid overboard. The game then becomes more difficult as hitting retards in the water will sink your ship.